10 posts tagged “kick-ass action chicks”
Having enjoyed Wright's turn as Nikki, the block's resident badass in the rather blah chicks-in-prison flick Civil Brand, it was good to go back to the original Blade, and see what she could do with a decent script and story. Here she plays a human haematologist, drawn into the crossfire when a rather crispy corpse is delivered to the hospital where she works, only to get up and start biting people! OMG! Sadly, she's one of his first snacks, and it's only Blade's timely flashback to his ill-fated mother's face that prevents him from dusting her there and then. Soon she's up to speed on the situation, vis-a-vis vampires, and standing shoulder to shoulder with her saviour. She's a SideChick of the best possible kind... strong, smart, and self-reliant... with qualities and/or skills to offer that the hero doesn't possess. She invents a whole new weapon to add to Blade's arsenal, and arguably saves the day/world on two separate occasions. Somehow, she even manages to look cute while climbing out of a zombie-infested cellar! In any fair and decent world, she would have had her own spin-off series... fighting the "suckfaces" with science, as well as solid punches.
Okay, so once upon a time some bright spark greenlit a thirteen-episode order for a dramedy series called Cashmere Mafia, "following the lives of four ambitious women, who have been best friends since their days at business school, as they try to balance their glamorous and demanding careers with their complex personal lives". It starred Lucy "Ling!" Liu and it died on its arse after just seven episodes, apparently... ending its days in a bargain bin in my local supermarket. The most likely reason for its failure is that it was a hectically-paced hybrid of Desperate Housewives and Sex & The City, without any of the jokes. And that's a damn shame, because the main cast are all very talented, and they look fabulous throughout... and Liu in particular deserves a decent regular gig, after being so consistently funny and engaging in everything from Ally McBeal to Kill Bill... and yes, even Charlie's Angels. Barracuda! Sadly, she also starred in Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever, which is the worst reviewed film ever made, according to aggregate site Rotten Tomatoes! I've never seen it myself, but I refuse to believe that any flick featuring her freckles could be totally unwatchable.
Rob Cohen (director of The Fast and the Furious) wasn't exaggerating when he suggested that, in terms of screen presence, Michelle Rodriguez is worth ten men. Maybe more. The opening shot of her debut feature, GirlFight, where the camera hesitantly tiptoes towards her piercing glare is astonishing. You wouldn't want to mess with that girl, even before she took up boxing lessons! But there's also a wounded vulnerability about her performance, and she carries the film with astounding confidence. It's a shame that her true talent has never been adequately utilised since then, although it was great to see her adopted into the cast of Lost. I drank up her work on the show like a thirsty castaway, and feel a tad sad that the majority of viewers didn't share my enthusiasm. At least 'Ana Lucia' got "fired" in a memorable way, and a plot-significant scene, I suppose. I even sat through S.W.A.T. for her, which was quite a frustrating experience. They make a big to-do about what an unlikely candidate her character was for the team, and so you might naturally expect her to prove her mettle at some point in the plot, but she doesn't actually contribute anything to the team's efforts past an initial training exercise on a plane. She isn't really a love interest either, and is one of the first to drop out during the showdown finale. Okay, one might argue that it would be ludicrous for a petite female to be the strongest member of the group, but would that really be any more ludicrous than anything else that happened in the movie? Regardless, it was a waste... although I did get a laugh from the way she introduced herself on the commentary: "I'm your momma on crack". There's also a line that was cut from the film itself, but included in the trailer, that makes me laugh every time I hear it. There's no point trying to reproduce it here, because it's all about the delivery. God love her, she needs to do more comedy. Scratch that, she needs to do more films, period.
There are probably many valid reasons to dislike Transporter 2 in general, but mine is a very specific complaint, because up until the tipping point I was actually enjoying this ridiculous flick. My complaint relates to the femme fatale who gamely flings herself across the DVD's cover, guns drawn, awesome abs rippling and eye-liner dribbling, suggesting that Jason Statham will really have his work cut out for him this time. Her name is Lola, (L-O-L-A, Lola) and she is so utterly evil and deranged she chooses to spend her days swanning around in skimpy underwear shooting policemen for kicks. Crikey! Their first meeting is a drawn-out game of cat-and-mouse, with exploding gas canisters and plenty of spent ammo cases... later she warms to him a little, and licks his face. Bless. So, by all accounts, the omens were good for a seriously twisted and protracted showdown between the forces of Cute-Freckled-Evil and Squinty-Celibate-Good.... but, in fact, it's all over in less than a minute. There's a bit of sub-Tarzan curtain-swinging, and then she goes and accidentally impales herself on the villain's ill-considered wall-of-spikes sculpture. I felt so cheated. In the end 'twas eccentric interior design that killed the beast...
For anyone who hasn't seen The Arena (1973), let me quote from the back of the case: "Female gladiators fight to the death! Inspired by the story of Spartacus, follow the adventures of a bevy of slave girls who, upon finding themselves thrust into the gladiator ring, mount a vicious rebellion to fight their way to freedom." The rebels are led by Pam Grier (playing Mamawi, a Nubian dancer) and Margaret Markov (playing Bodicia of Britannia, apparently), back together again to re-bottle the lightning they unleashed in Black Mama, White Mama! Never heard of it? Well then, this film probably isn't for you. This is the sort of B-Movie exploitation fare that Tarantino grew up on, and frankly it's a little hard to sit through, unless you have a predilection for cheesy dialogue and somewhat wooden acting. I'm not sure if that's the cast's fault, or if it's a side-effect of the restrictive resources... it must have taken a fair bit of cash and rehearsal time to stage the fight scenes, and since that (along with the comely cast) was what people would be paying to see, there wouldn't have been much point worrying about nuance or depth of character. There are still a few pretty good jokes in there, among the awfully creaky ones, and a lot more going on plot-wise than you might expect... but it's no Gladiator, obviously. Grier, however, makes the whole ride a lot smoother, and it's really no surprise that she has had such a long and successful career. She was one of the first real action heroines, and a true icon for lovers of brassy and sassy cinematic ball-busters... or, to quote one of her posters, "she's brown sugar and spice, but if you don't treat her nice... she'll put you on ice!" Can you dig it?
Apparently Blade II was Kile's debut as an actress, being a dancer by trade, but you wouldn't guess it from her performance. At times she seems a little too sweet to be part of a ruthless vampire death squad, but that just adds texture to the grunting, macho group dynamic, and more poignancy to her fate. Throughout his commentary, del Toro happily admits borrowing various shots and influences from comic books, so it isn’t too much of a stretch to suggest that Verlaine bears a striking resemblance to a 2000 AD character called “Durham Red”, who was a bit of a vamp herself (well, more of a day-walking “dhampyr” if you want to get pedantic). Still it’s a strong, striking look... both on the page, and on the screen... so I’m not complaining.
There are a couple of things wrong with the Thai martial-arts flick Chocolate. First (and worst) of all is that title... true, the main character does eat sweets now and again, and they may well contain chocolate beneath their colourful coating... but you can't call every film that features children eating sweets "Chocolate", now can you? Second of all is the rather dull half-hour that precedes the ass-kickery promised by the menu screen clips and cover photos. I understand why it's there, to establish the characters and their struggles, and make the roaring rampage of revenge that much sweeter... but that doesn't mean it has to be such a drag, does it? Man wants woman, woman wants other man, both men are gangsters, woman and other man have baby, first man is angry about that, threats and toe-chopping ensue. Tra la la la. The baby daughter in question, Zen (played by a gymnastic young actress named JeeJa Yanin), turns out to be autistic... but it's a special sort of action-movie autism, which allows her to learn and mimic any fight move she sees on TV, or in person. Handy! It sounds a little silly, but it actually makes for some great showdowns... particularly the one where she meets a foe whose moves are so random she can barely keep up.
The story takes a while to get rolling, but once Zen finds her feet as a fighter, it turns into an absurdly awesome spectacle. That's "awesome" in the true sense of the word, btw. While Zen may be able to learn new moves in a matter of minutes, Yanin spent about two years training and learning the choreography... and it shows. There's minimal wire-work, and it's all painfully, bone-crunchingly real... as proven by the rather unpleasant out-takes. I'm no expert on martial-arts flicks... in fact my frame of reference pretty much begins and ends with Jackie Chan... but if the action was always this fast, funny and furious, then I'd be a big fan. Slapstick is always good for a laugh or two, but especially when it crops up in the middle of an otherwise very serious and deadly duel. Thinking about it, Zen is what Buffy should have become after seven years of her supposed evolution as a Slayer... a seemingly innocent and sweet-natured girl, who can kick you down a heating vent faster than you can blink. This film is crying out to become a franchise, because the concept still has a lot of juice left in it, now that the character has been established. She's unbeatable in combat, but in day-to-day life she is almost entirely reliant on her friends and family. That's a pretty novel twist on the Drunken/Blind Master concept, even if it isn't necessarily in the best possible taste. If nothing else, Yanin deserves some kind of medal for what she put herself through, as well as some slightly easier gigs that showcase her talent and dedication without putting her neck on the line.
For years before it was re-released on DVD, and therefore widely available in high street shops, the Russ Meyer exploitation flick Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill! had some pretty good word of mouth. Not only did it inspire the name of one of my sister’s favourite sleaze-rock bands, but it was often dropped into conversation by the more discerning Riot Grrrls. The poster, at least, was legend... with Tura Satana assuredly laying the smack down. Sadly, as I discovered shortly after purchase, the film itself does not entirely live up to the hype... at least, not to my jaded contemporary eyes. In its time, no doubt it was shocking and electrifying... the “sandbox jousting” scene, boasted about in the trailer, must have been a gripping feisty feminist finale... but post-Buffy, the dialogue is kind of a drag, and the pace is snail-shamingly slow. How can one ever hope to understand the thrill of watching Meyer’s masterpiece the way its initial audiences experienced it? Well... what you can do, and most assuredly should do, is rent Tarantino’s Death Proof!
Much like From Dusk ‘Till Dawn, this is a film of two distinct halves. The first half sets up the major villain of the piece, Kurt Russell’s mean-ass mother-trucker, Stuntman Mike, as he lays waste to an unfortunate foursome of girls. The second half sees him return, to try and repeat his sick tricks on a trio of far hardier femmes. But these kitties have claws! Either half could stand on its own merits, of course... the first as a cautionary horror story about accepting lifts from strange men, and the second as a cautionary tale about pissing off Zoë Bell... but putting them together, you get the full satisfaction out of one of the most jaw-dropping final shots I’ve ever seen. The End, indeed! There's no denying that there’s still some dead-weight in there, as far as yackety-yak goes, but Tarantino’s verbiage is always entertaining, even when it’s extraneous... and it’s more than made up for by the adrenaline rush of the final chase scene, which left me breathless and agape, as the fantastic “Chick Habit” plays out over the end credits.
The “Grindhouse” aesthetic has already begun creeping into other films, adverts and computer games (specifically House of the Dead: Overkill, which I blasted my way through a few days ago, and rather enjoyed), but this film’s major legacy will most likely be the launching of Bell’s career as a leading lady. It was a bit of risk on Tarantino’s part, since at the time she was a stuntwoman by trade, with no major talkie parts on her resume... but there’s something so infectious and irrepressible about her personality, and that comes across loud and clear on the big screen, encouraging almost immediate affection. Add to that the fact that she could kick your arse all the way to Auckland and back... and her casting must have been a no-brainer. In a recent interview with the AV Club, she admitted that acting scares her more than hanging from the hood of a speeding car... which makes sense, but I suppose it depends which you’re more willing to bruise... your body, or your feelings. Still, it doesn’t seem to have stopped her, as she’s currently starring in a web-only series written by Ed Brubaker, called Angel of Death. Sadly not available for viewing in this country, but the trailer makes it look pretty groovy.
